(eventually to become The Good Guys, The EUMENIDES) 


Part (i) The Tri-Cycle of Life (Including Families, Who’d Have ‘Em?) 

The Merry-go-round that goes around comes around again, 

As it always will be, the sins of our parents will haunt you and me 

The cycle of life, the turn of the screw and the twist of the knife 

There’s no primogeniture, no rhyme or reason, it’s what we’re all destined for. 

The path is marked out, the example is set so there can be no doubt 

It all ends in tears, all men are cursed with their worst nightmares and fears 

The lying, double dealings, all the cheating, the deceit, all the troubled feelings 

The evil backstabbing, the killings, the betrayals and all the money grabbing 

No family or clan, can escape this plan however lowly or grand 

Free will’s out of the window, so sin, go feel free to drink up your fill 


Now there’s all this and lots more going on at an Argos family convention 

A lot indeed, a strange kith and kin in need of some serious intervention. 

The trouble is, it’s more likely to be GBH than TLC 


Head of the family is Algie, a fighter a right macho womaniser 

Not a fatherly bone in his body and sat on his left hand is Chloe, 

Equally quick to stray to make hay so neither short of complaints 

Both with a rage and temper on them to try the patience of saints 

There’s three offspring as far as we know, but who knows there may be others 

Eldest daughter Ellie, then Iffy, and lastly Orville the brother 

A dancing dysfunctional clan solely for the Devil’s pleasure 

With every neuroses known unto Man and some new ones thrown in for good measure 

It doesn’t bode well, for their future, I fear as five go mad in suburbia 


Algie saw his youngest daughter as the sacrificial lamb, 

And when push came to shove it’s bye bye Iffy, he didn’t give a damn 

Unlike Chloe who was livid, but vividly distracted by daughter Number 1 

They’re in a psychosexual struggle, the greatest tug of love bar none 

Ellie’s bent clearly’s a parental leaning 

“Daddy’s Little Girl” has now a whole new meaning 

Ellie’s rather – partial to her father, 

Keen to keep it in the family. A hellish complex I’m sure you’ll agree 

Then Algie showed up with Cassie, his latest flame, 

For Chloe, the straw that broke the camel’s back 

She took an axe to Algie, and Cassie got the same 

You would have thought she’d foresee the attack 

Ellie, now left without a lover summoned Orville her faithful brother 

Who, returning to the family home with Ellie’s blessing slew his own mother. 


Part (ii) The Chthonic Deities (including The Genesis of Nemesis) 

(a) Ice Cold Alex 

When Chas the Greek castrated Uri the blood and semen flowed 

Some of the seed came all over Gay and wha’ d’you know 

Nine months later a smileless child from a mad mam and dad, a rum dad and mum 

Given the name of Ice Cold Alex, The Eternally Angry Young Woman 

There’s not much scope in the caring professions for one with an eye on the moral transgressions 

So it’s off to join “The Vengence Police” 

(b) Tissy the Hissyfit 

Mandys and Alcohol rarely mix, here’s Tissy the Hissyfit 

No pleasant cocktail this little minx, a shock of a tale 

Mandy is jealousy as hell of her daughter, with badness and gladness, no hint of sadness 

She sells her into the white slave trade but Luck doesn’t forsake her, 

a young buck takes her, and makes her his wife but this hapless chap’s poisoned by trouble and strife 

Not an auspicious start to their married life. 

(c) MegaMiss 

Daughter of Night and an Ache in the groin of a father who should have known better 

Another avenging angel was spawned, but forget the begetter 

This Miss would enlist with Alex and Tissy seek out the disloyal, whether common or royal 

And avenge, avenge, avenge, avenge, she’s christened “The Jealous One” 

She’s green with envy and angry as hell complementing the others so well 

This evil triumvirate is ready to run.               Job done! 


Part (iv) The Furies at Work (including Incest, A Game for All The family) 

So this deadly trio trawled the towns and cities avenging Angels, searching for “business” 

Lo and behold; the troubled Argos Clan would come to the attention of the evil Chthonic deities 

Ice Cold Alex, Tissy the Hissyfit and the MegaMiss, “A triple Whammy”, they agreed 

These losers just got everything we need 

At first they stood on the sidelines egging them on, this family’s appalling behaviour’s equal to none, 

Every now and then, they’d throw a spanner in the works just to keep these psychopaths on their toes 

with the evil only mankind knows. 

It was only a matter of time, with their heads a-clatter with crime before the ATM team could not help themselves 

and set out to wreak their special kind of vengeance 

The relentless pursuit of Orville and Ellie making their lives so unbearable, driving them into insanity.


Part(iv) All Is Avenged (Including You Men, IDs, Please?) 

Year after year this angelic unholy alliance pursued their prey, in a very merry dance 

Oh how they laughed, with hearts full of joy and with evil witch-craft, hell bent on “Destroy” 

Orville is dead beat, down and out, on his last legs, but a Royal Pardon is sought, as sure as eggs is eggs, 

So justice is done and is seen to be done. The honours are shared, no-one deemed to have won 

The angels suggest a mock trial, and quite rightly; Orville, as expected gets off quite lightly 

Community service is the punishment for the crime, the remaining Argos family, live in peace ‘til the end of time.