Malice À Forethought

Part (i) The Hypocratic Oaf (including The Thoughtful Brothers, Promo and Epimo)

When mortal and immortal worlds collide

The strong will conquer, the weak must hide

Is it enough to claim the Gods are on your side

Good or evil, the jury’s out, now you decide.

Introducing Zero

Like a god some might say. No-one gets in his way.

“The Mafia? Uh! I know no fear“,

he ruled with a rod of iron, a fist of steel

His Achilles’ heel, as with most immortals, was to feed his greed.


Omnipotent and omniscient, fingers in many pies, a spinner of lies,

a sinner of almighty proportion.

On his manor, the watchword was “caution”

And his manner was one of “no compromise”.


No-one dared cross swords with Zed, no cross words were ever said. Zero got nil by mouth.


It was a prime time for crime as usual,

So recruiting for looting was high on his mind

Zero, summoned two trusty lieutenants,

Promo and Epimo, a.k.a.

Forethought and Afterthought

To rustle up some new blood, to swell the ranks,

to flood the manor, and break the banks

with more men, urban war men, up to no good.


“Forethought” thought that he knew what he fought for,

“Afterthought” fought with a little more thought.


They mined primal clay, to mould new recruits,

Into the perfect henchmen, sharp eyed, sharp suits

it was a taming of the crew, it was the naming of the few

with evil afoot and evil ahead

and firearms, free gratis, from Zed


“Forethought” thought that he knew what he fought for,

“Afterthought” fought with a little more thought.


As a finishing touch they gave them two sacks

The first, with their own evil, slung across their backs

The second, much heavier, hung round their neck

Containing the faults of every human wreck


The psychomanic, the masochistic, the sociopathic,

the misanthropic, the unblessed, all mad bad men

every mental disorder, the misogynistic

and all the sadistic criminal minds


It’s hard to see our sack on our back

The one at the front’s in full view;

So what do we do, what do we do.


Part (ii) Survival of the Wittest

One day, Promo, decided to challenge the Almighty One

to play a trick on the Godfather, to have a little fun

A game of wit and wisdom, an opening seen to get one up

In my left hand a ball, in my right hand a cup

Cup, ball, ball, cup; ha, ha, ha!


listen carefully, though, as always there’s a trick in the tail

choose the plain ball or choose the gold cup, it’s up to you

Will you win, lose, pass or fail.


Nought but gold caught Zero’s eye,

Winning lukewarm vinegar, far too far gone

He could have won the ball filled with chilled Dom Perignon

“Champagne for my friends”, thought Promo, “real pain for my enemies”.


Consumed by greed and need, Zed could not resist the allure of the gold,

but listen, all that glistens is not necessarily… cold.


Part (iii) Revenge is Sweet, so slayeth the Lord (including Nox Otium and Dies Cruciamentum)

Feeling a fool and revenge on his mind

Zed reclaimed the free pieces he had given away.

Surrender your weapons by the end of the day

For you hirelings, no more firings unless I say.


Promo said, “up yours, Zed, “back the truck up”

No-one forced you to choose the poisonous cup

And he stole back the guns, right under Zed’s eyes

Not knowing that Zed had one more surprise.


I am the Godfather of Heaven’s Fire, and I bring you…


No, on second thoughts, not death,

A worse fate, a cursed fate for life

a fate worse even than my fated offspring could dream up,

Let me introduce you; this is Arturo, and this is Caro and Lum

and they are no strangers to torture chambers,

curtailing your life, handy with a knife;

making that vital string a much shorter thing.


Eddie the Eagle, the evil bird of prey

Relentless torture is what he fought for

those he set his gaze on were first heard to pray

and then heard to say, “no more encore”


All day long he will pick at your brain

but leave you overnight, Oh! He’s clever.

He’ll return the next morn to start over again

And this will go on ... FOREVER.


Part (iv) P and/or A (perceived as Eve)

Not content with this little wheeze,

Zed wanted to bring Promo’s family to their knees,

He summoned Epimo and offered him a “box”,

a very special “box”, a very nice chest indeed

You might say, “The box rocks”.


Epimo was young and naive,

He can’t believe his eyes, when he clocks the “box”

This is the first woman he’s ever seen.

Indeed the first woman that there’s ever been.

For Epimo, Opportunity Knocks


He felt a rise in his thighs, something grew

the “ayes” have it, now he knew

Eve really is the bee’s knees, the d’s bs,

Eve really is a dream come true


But little does he know, when his back is turned,

she’s offering her favours for all to savour,

of all Zero gave her she has no more,

a shell of her former self, washed up on the shore.


Epimo appeals to her, “Hey babe, call it a day, shut up shop,

ration the passion, put the locks on the box”

and in the nick of time, she did draw in the reins.

only a remnant of Hope remains.

And now as we leave this scene, it’s the dawning of the mourning for Eve.


Part (v) Post Box

(including Promo’s first letter to The Pangaeans)

Promo gets a message to a long lost friend

No more pretence, he’s at his wit’s end

Along came Hero always eager to please

Recently returned from a long stretch “overseas”


A strong arm tactician, with long harm ambition


To see off Eddie the Eagle, get one over on Zero

And to defend his reputation and name as Numero Uno


This dynamic duo is more than a match

for Eddie the Eagle, who was summarily despatched

So Promo’s nightmare is eventually over

Free from the cruel relentless mental torture


No more domicidal clattering, No more incessant chattering,


So with E out of the picture and with Promo’s release,

It was the beginning of the end, all hostilities cease


And so for a short time, at least,

the heavens and the earth were at peace

some might say it was all in vain

as war happens again and again and again


Don’t be tempted by worthless baubles wrapped up in glitter

Don’t overdo the revenge, though sweet; don’t get too bitter

Don’t trust old men offering boxes, they’re usually evil creatures

Don’t be taken in, or swayed in any way by pretty features, and

Don’t lose Hope.